Dating advice
Ever have your sarcasm mistaken for a murderous threat… on a first date?
I went out with this girl, who I had only met once, briefly, and things were going fine. Typical small talk, first-date banter, with that awkward energy that we all know and love. Conversation turned to movies, and it turns out, every single one of her favorites was a horror film. With a self-conscious-sounding, vulnerable inflection, she said “I guess I must really like being scared!”
And without thinking, I switched to a creepy-as-shit, solemn voice, looked her in the eye, and said, “GOOD. BECAUSE AFTER DRINKS, I’M GOING TO KILL YOU.”
… silence …
And then…
just tears.
Best date ever?
